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Snarky Retirement Send-Off

Whether your Party Planning Committee is 2 people or 20, you’ll be the talk of the office with this snarky, factual party (periods are more professional, after all). Throw a retirement party your colleague will never forget. Don’t forget a sassy cake phrase and passive aggressive balloons. No exclamation points needed, because retirement is only fun for the person retiring.


  • Balloon Time Helium Tank
  • Latex balloons
  • Stick-on letters
  • Black tablecloth
  • Black and gray ribbon, banners and decorations
  • A cake that describes your true feelings


  1. Arrange cake and serving utensils on the black tablecloth.
  2. Inflate balloons with Balloon Time Helium Tank and tie down in bundles around the table.
  3. Use the stick-on letters to write passive aggressive messages on the balloons.
  4. Avoid bright colors or happy music, because this ex-coworker is leaving you with more work and less fun, and you aren’t happy about that.

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Note: Adult supervision is required when using balloons and sharp objects. Please read all warnings and precautions on Balloon Time packaging.

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